The HumbleBrag Olympics: Amy Chua, Tiger Mom Wins Gold Medal
Uggggh just ate about fifteen piece of chocolate gotta learn to control myself when flying first class or they’ll cancel my modelling contract LOL :p #humblebrag
I read about the HumbleBrag for the first time on Shuflies and not only did it ring true, but it’s just so funny: “Humblebrags can be any length. Amy Chua’s ‘Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother’ was one very long humblebrag. The memoir’s subtitle should have a few words appended: “This is a story about a mother, two daughters, and two dogs. This was supposed to be a story of how Chinese parents are better at raising kids than Western ones. But instead, it’s about a bitter clash of cultures, a fleeting taste of glory, and how I was humbled by a thirteen-year-old… but my kids still turned out better than yours anyway.”
So I just wanted to cull out the Top 10 HumbleBrags in The Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.
p.s. The dirty little secret of why Amy Chua’s daughter Sophia got into Harvard and Yale: Legacy at Harvard for both parents, non-Asian at both schools because she’s half Caucasian, and special consideration at Yale for both parents being on the faculty. I wonder if she will tell us how much she donated to Harvard…
10. “…when Western parents think they’re being strict, they usually don’t come close to being Chinese mothers. For example, my Western friends who consider themselves strict make their children practice their instruments thirty minutes every day. At hour at most. For a Chinese Mother, the first hour is the easy part. It’s hours two and three that get tough.”
9. “I don’t believe in astrology — and I think people who do have serious problems … I was born in the Year of the Tiger. I don’t want to boast or anything, but Tiger people are noble, fearless, powerful, authoritative, and magnetic. They are also supposed to be lucky. Beethoven and Sun Yat-Sen were both Tigers.”
8. “Classical music was the opposite of decline, the opposite of laziness, vulgarity, and spoiledness. It was a way for my children to achieve something I hadn’t. But it was also a tie-in to the high cultural tradition of my ancient ancestors.”
7. “Thank goodness I’m a lucky person, because all my life I’ve made important decisions for the wrong reasons … I did not get asked back to meet the full Yale Law faculty which meant I’d flunked the lunch. In other words, I’d been rejected by Jed’s colleagues. This was not ideal — and it made socializing a little tricky.”
6. “That’s when I decided to write an epic novel. Unfortunately, I had no talent for novel writing.. What’s more, Maxine Hong Kingston, Amy Tan, and Jung Chang all beat me to it with their books… At first, I was bitter and resentful, but then I got over it and came up with a new idea.”
5. “I love being able to count on Sophia. She has wells of inner strength. Even more than me, she can take anything: exclusion, excoriation, humiliation, loneliness.”
4. ” As he [Professor Wei-Yi Yang] helped Sophia bring the piece to life, adding layer upon layer of nuance, all I could think was, This man is a genius. I am a barbarian. Prokofiev is a genius. I am a cretin… Going to lessons with Wei-Yi became my favorite thing; I looked forward to it all week. At every session I would religiously take notes, the scales falling from my eyes. Occasionally, I felt out of my league.”
3. “One of my students, named Ronan, found some practice notes I’d left for Lulu…Lying around were dozens of instruction sheets, some typed, some handwritten, that I’d forgotten to hide. “I can’t believe it. These are so — weird.” “I don’t they were weird. But you can judge for yourself…By the way, in the second one, the “m,” means “measure” – so yes, I’m giving measure-by-measure instructions.”
2. “A tiny part of me regrets that I didn’t marry another Chinese person and worries that I am letting down four thousand years of civilization.”
1. “Had I perhaps just chosen the wrong activity for Lulu? Tennis is very respectable — it wasn’t like bowling. Michael Chang has played tennis… She recently made the high school varsity team, the only middle school kid to do so… I secretly plant ideas in her tennis coach’s head, texting her with questions and practice strategies, then deleting the text messages so Lulu won’t see them. Sometimes, when Lulu’s least expecting it — at breakfast or when I’m saying goodnight — I’ll suddenly yell out, ‘More rotation on the swing volley!’ or ‘Don’t move your right foot with your kick serve!’ And Lulu will plug her ears, and we’ll fight, but I’ll have gotten my message out, and I know she knows I’m right.”
Ok, some of the quotes are straight brags. What is your favorite humblebrag?